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Puncture Wounds To Heaven

from How To Disappear by Casey

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    Buy the new album 'How To Disappear' on Eruption Red Marble 12" Vinyl featuring alternate sleeve art.

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lyrics

I barely notice as you pick up all the pieces.
How long have I been like this?

You must be tired, and I’m still trying to find the words to compensate for how vacant I’ve been today. Can’t believe that I would take you for granted. God I hate myself for letting you shoulder the weight for two. If it gets too much to hold, I won’t blame you if you go.

In every conversation you fight for my attention,
but I can feel the ennui that wears down your affection.

Does it help if I say I’m sorry?
I know you must be tired, but I’m scared because I no longer recognise myself.

So whose role have I been modeled after?
Mother’s warmth and father’s laughter,
yet somewhere in between with my anxieties and guilt.
Oh, what is the price of my reprieve
if not a life of misery?
Held hostage by a blade of shame,
with your name at the hilt.

But I still can’t find the words to compensate for how vacant I have been. Never meant to take you for granted, but I know that I did. God I hate myself for how you must think about me now. Know how much it hurts to grieve, but please don’t hate me if I leave.

credits

from How To Disappear, released January 12, 2024

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Casey Wales, UK

We have no grand design,
music is a labour of love.

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